Harry Potter and the Furby of DOOOOOOM!
by Harry's Girl 01031992
Summary: Harry buys a Furby possessed by someone evil. Chaos ensues! Disclaimer: I don't own HP or Furby... Don't sue!
1. The Horror Begins

Harry Potter and the Furby of **DOOOOOM!**

One day, Harry decided to go to Wal-Mart and spontaneously buy something. He went into the toy section and saw one of the most unusual things of all: A FURBY! He paid an outrageous amount of 1 billion dollars and 89 cents.

When Harry got back to Hogwarts, he decided to show his friends, Ron and Hermione, this new and strange device.

"Blimey!" Ron exclaimed. "It looks like my great-aunt Cleotilda's overweight parrot!"

"Harry," Hermione said in a cautious tone. "Why did you buy this… thing? Furbies are usually evil and they annoy you to the point of insanity! I'd be careful if I were you."

"Nonsense!" Harry said. "This thing looks perfectly gentle. Now… What should we name it?"

"How about Sir Fatty Poopy-pants Lebowitz!" Ron excitedly exclaimed.

"Okay then…" Harry muttered. Then the trio started playing with the toy and performing every Furby torture technique known to man. Little did the trio know that something bad was about to happen.


	2. Flying, Flaming Toilets and Tubas

**Disclaimer: I don't own HP, Furby, Madonna's "Like A Virgin", the hokey pokey, PCD's "Don't Cha", the Macarena, Michael Jackson's "Beat It" or G-Unit clothing, so don't sue!**

A week later, Harry, Ron, and Hermione got bored of the disturbing looking plaything and it was starting to freak them out.

"I kept on having dreams last night that the furby was trying to seduce me by singing 'Like a Virgin' and doing the hokey pokey." Ron said.

"Same here," Hermione said. "But the furby was doing the Macarena and it was singing 'Don't Cha'! I'll never look at school dances the same way again!"

"There's something not right about that thing." Harry said in a curious tone. "It has an evil look in its eye that looks all too familiar." Just then, a flaming toilet came swooping towards the group. They ducked and the fiery, porcelain object hit the wall and exploded.

"Well, that was random." Ron remarked. Then Snape came into the common room dressed in a mini dress and he started singing "Beat It". "Correction… That thing that just happened now was even more random!"

"Harry," Hermione said. "You need to go to Dumbledore and tell him about the Furby and about what just happened."

The next day, Harry went to Dumbledore's office. He had to climb 500 flights of stairs and had to open 12 secret passages. He finally reached Dumbledore's office. He knocked on the door. "Come in," said a warm and gentle voice. Harry opened the door and walked into the office. He saw Dumbledore dressed in G-Unit clothing and practicing his tuba.

"Hello, Harry!" Dumbledore chimed. "How are you today?"

"Paranoid…" Harry mumbled.

"Why, I ask, are you paranoid, Harry?" the wise man inquired.

"Well, I bought a Furby at Wal-Mart last week and it just sent a flaming toilet flying at me, Ron, and Hermione. It sort of frazzled us a bit and we think the Furby is evil."

"Harry," Dumbledore said. "Try using the "Accio Voldemort" charm whenever you're near the Furby to see if Voldemort is possessing it."

"Will, do, Professor." Harry said. "Well, I must be leaving."

"Good day, Harry!" Dumbledore cried. When Harry left, he randomly forgot everything that Dumbledore told him.


	3. Pomfreylicious and Skivvy Dancing

When Harry got back to the Gryffindor Common room, Hermione and Ron anticipated those few words that would help them find the answers to the goings on at Hogwarts.

"What did Dumbledore say, Harry?" Hermione breathlessly asked.

"Uh… I forgot…" Harry said.

"Gosh darn it, Harry!" Ron shouted. "Why did you forget??"

"I don't know!" Harry cried back. "I just somehow randomly forgot for some reason!"

"We need to take you to the nurse's office to get a memory potion that'll help you remember what Dumbledore said to you." Hermione said.

The gang headed to the nurses office which was on the first floor, which was 2,999 floors below the Gryffindor common room.

It took them about six hours to get down there and when they arrived, Madame Pomfrey, the nurse, was randomly singing "Fergalicious", but her own version called "Pomfreylicious".

"Madame Pomfrey," Hermione said.

"Pomfreylicious: definition: Make them boys go loco." Madame Pomfrey sang.

"Madame Pomfrey," Hermione said again.

"They want my treasure so they get their pleasures from my photo." She sang.

"Dang it," Ron said. "Madame Pomfrey won't shut up and listen. Let's just grab the potion and get the bloody hell out of here before she starts singing the chorus."

"I agree." Harry remarked. He ran over to the medicine cabinet and grabbed a bottle labeled _Doctor Stetson's Memory Restorative_. "I got it!" Harry exclaimed.

"Good," Ron said. "Because she's on the chorus."

"AAAAAGH!" Hermione wailed. "My ears!!!!"

"So delicious (It's hot, hot), So delicious (I put them boys on rock, rock) So delicious (they wanna slice of what I got), Pomfreylicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty)" Madame Pomfrey sang.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione bolted out of there like the devil was upon them. When they got back to the common room, they caught their breaths.

"You should take the potion now, Harry." Hermione said.

Harry untwisted the lid on the bottle and drank the remedy. His eyes dilated for a second and then returned to normal, meaning he now had gained back that one specific memory.

"Well?" Ron asked. "Do you remember what Dumbledore told you?"

"Yeah," Harry replied. "He said we should try using 'Accio Voldemort' and I remember that you danced in your mirror to 'Do Ya Think I'm Sexy' in your skivvies last night before you went to bed, Ron."

"THAT IS A TOTAL LIE!" Ron screamed.

"The potion never lies, Ron." Hermione giggled, reading from the bottle. "It has a touch of Veritaserum in it."

"Okay, go get the Furby, Ron." Harry said.

Ron did as he was told and came back within .5 seconds.

Harry took his wand out of his pocket and waved it at the Furby and said, "Accio Voldemort." Nothing happened. He tried the spell numerous times, but using names of different Death Eaters instead of Voldemort's.

"Who haven't you named?" Hermione asked, getting frustrated.

"I don't think I named Wormtail." Harry said. So he tried it and lo and behold, in place of the Furby was Wormtail.


End file.
